So, you may or may not know the last post was about a jumble sale I help with - if you could be arsed reading it (and I fully understand if you didn't) - you'll know what a malodorous, disgusting affair it was. I haven't posted anything since because I've been in the bath desperately scouring the foul stench from my person.
OK, so that isn't true - I did have several baths and showers and I now believe there may also be something in the air at jumble sales - spores perhaps - that lodge in the lungs; I had flu like symptoms for a few days after too.
Moving on though, I'm about to embark upon an experiment. I'm moving out of my current flat but not moving in anywhere else. Firstly, the flat I'm leaving was OK but is unfortunately situated in an area of Leith which sucks balls big time. Secondly; I'm not going to live in a cardboard box and beg outside the Cooperative, my parents both have spare rooms so I'm going to float between the two.
I have no idea how long this will last, maybe only a week but you never know.
Its been interesting up till now even, I keep thinking to myself 'but where will I sit at night?' I can't sit with either parent for various reasons; not limited to soap operas, other family members and heating controls set at a level just below the temperature of molten lava. The point of the experiment is to not go 'home' to sit drinking wine and watching crap on the telly when I could (and should) be doing more useful things.
People I've spoken to can't get their head round the idea of not having a base, a place to keep your 'stuff' or a home to go to. The idea of living an entirely nomadic lifestyle (within certain limits, for example; I won't have a camel) is bizarre to them. Since I have no dependents I can up sticks easily and just go. I own no furniture and very little in the way of anything else. Any clothing I've not worn for six months and things like bedding have gone to the Salvation Army and recycling respectively; all of my belongings now fit in the boot of my car.*
It goes with out saying I'll be back on the electoral register well in advance of September 2014. Some of the stories - or should that be scaremongering - doing the rounds are as daft as they are untrue. Osborne's been up again bumping his gums about Scotland not being able to use it's own currency, while newspapers in England are reporting Philip Hammond (the Tory defence secretary) intends to use money earmarked for English Health & Education to assuage MOD budget stupidity. Osborne knows he can't decimate the UK's balance of payments with out serious repercussions and Hammond probably doesn't know that by diverting money away from Health and Education in England, there would be cuts to Scotland's block grant via Barnett Consequentials. Since Scotland receives no BC's for defence (it isn't devolved) we'll be left out of pocket funding Tory wet dreams... Again...
But I digress.
There was something else - My eBook. I had to 'unpublish' it, I rushed it out and now every one thinks my spelling and grammar is shit - which is true - but not as shit as that; I spent an entire day redrafting. It seems Mrs Chalmers, my primary school teacher, was right to put on every single report card over the course of my primary education; 'must try harder'.
I'm now off to finish cleaning out my old flat, I can't say I'll be sorry to be leaving. Having had two motorbikes stolen from the so-called secure car park, and on a daily basis having to fend off approaches by those horrid people who speak from a point just behind their nose and call you 'pal' all the time; I'm happy to bid it, them and the area an unfond farewell.
* Not strictly true, I have two motorcycles & associated paraphernalia and a ton of tools which I use to keep one on the road and the other in various stages of dis/repair. I also have a lot of outdoor gear.
Its all kept elsewhere anyway so for the purposes of this daft - by which I mean - interesting experiment; none of it counts.