Thursday, 20 March 2014

Johann Lamont's Devolution Commission Report/Why do the SNP ALWAYS go on about independence at Holyrood.

Straight away, this blog article gets the award for having the longest title so far - not any where near the lengths a 'George Laird Special' achieves right enough - but since I couldn't begin to compete with the logic and erudition he deploys, I mean to say; I know my place.

First up, you'll have heard about this:

Ok, maybe not, but there it is anyway. Akin to finding a dog turd in front of your garden gate - with each item requiring similar levels of thought (if not effort) in its production.

I don't imagine it matters much - regardless of how you plan to vote - but who was on the commission?

The usual throbbers, Curran and Sarwar stick out. While reading, I couldn't help my inner monologue assuming a blood-curdling vocal & visual conflation of Sarwar & Lamont with disturbing undertones of Curran - I mean I had no choice but to stop. Suffice to say, it's complete arse-gravy, all the words are from the English language but they don't appear in any order that makes sense.

In the finest tradition of this blog and keeping within my comfort zone - here's a synopsis fellow idiots can understand:

People of Scotland.
Vote no and we'll gift* the parliament of Scotland the power to raise taxes but only lower them if Westminster does, oh, and if Westminster raises them, you have to raise them too. This is to prevent Scotland gaining any sort of advantage at all or ever while Westminster 'pools & shares' Scottish resources & revenues to benefit parts of the UK that aren't Scotland. 
* Dependent on the UK labour party accepting these proposals (they don't) and on them getting in to Government at Westminster (they won't, see: Ed Miliband) and on Scottish Labour getting in to power at Holyrood (they won't, see: Johann Lamont.)

I suppose there might be other things in the paper, after all, it took them three years to write its 300 odd pages. But for reasons I've already outlined, if you could read it at all - it simply cannot be perused with a straight face, or with out at least a little bit of sick coming up in to your mouth. I'm assuming most of the people who read this blog aren't overly interested in the sordid details, but if you are - there are other far more qualified and better informed sources for information.

My inner monologue this week.

Its easy to be flippant about this, but there is significant support for further devolution in the independence debate - it seems Labour with its tempting claims from last year about devolving corporation tax, Air Passenger Duty (a stifling tax on the Scottish Tourist industry) tax on cigarettes and beer among others - have totally bottled it. The truth is, this is the British Labour party talking, they don't want their power in the UK undermined by giving the Scottish parliament (which they don't control) any more power at all.

At this point, the Tories could actually offer more and make Labour look quite stupid, the Conservatives have no sway at Holyrood - nor are they ever likely to. That said, David Cameron (for it would be he and not Ruth Davidson) could still offer the thin edge of fuck all and still be offering more than Johann's devolution commission did this week.

But that's the whole point isn't it; none of the Westminster parties are offering anything, they managed to get together quick-smart to rule out a Currency Union but when it comes to ruling things in... Despite Scottish Labour's impotent commission and the Liberal Democrat's promise of a federal UK - a promise almost as old & just as pointless (but not quite) as Menzies Campbell himself - a no vote means we'll get nothing except powers stripped away by Westminster Tories high on saving this sham of a union and a trough they're all already baw-deep in.

Anyway, the point is, if you want more power: you'll have to vote yes in September.

And so on to the second thing...

... which is gratifyingly short and sweet; its about Unionist parties forever banging on about - wait for it - the SNP forever banging on about Independence in the Holyrood chamber.

This appeared on the BBC news website today.

From the BBC

It's a 'Question Wheel' and isn't it colourful? It could be found (past tense) this morning among all the murrrrrrrrdurrrrrrrrrr an' fitba' on the BBC's 'Scottish' news section. As you can probably tell, the reason the SNP seem to always be going on about independence is because its all Labour (in red) & the Libdems (in yellow) go on about.

Guess what? Its not there now, its tucked away in the Scottish Politics section, which is visited even less often than this blog.

I wonder what happened to the intern who posted that story...


  1. One glaring void in this independence referendum is the almost total lack of integrity in any of the MSM which why the UK has become a shit place to be associated with the worst culprit being the BBC.

    As to this total incoherent piece of Devo whatever with two professors being cited shows we can't even trust the academic profession to be academic which is a sad place for humanity to have reached, witch doctors now have the upper hand.

    p.s when did text become numbers? from a non robot.

  2. I assume you're talking about the anti spam thing, I tried turning it off but I got deluged by offers of Romanian brides, advice on debt, Thai brides (tempting...) and much more besides. Did you know you can get pills that make your-


    You're quite right of course. The BBC is a travesty in the indy campaign. I can't decide whether they're doing it deliberately (as in a planned response) or its cellular with lots of BBC people operating independently.

    The devo thing is a joke, its also incredibly patronising - that they expect any one to swallow that shit?


  3. Pa

    The whole thing has been a big let down and Lamontable. Although I must say her car crash interviews where she said the Scottish Government controls 75% of tax was a good laugh, even I know that is crap and she is meant to be their leader.

    Their devo nano proposals are insulting and should add to the yes vote. How they thought that any of what they propose would be taken seriously is beyond me, what a shambles of a politicial party. They have no idea about what Scotland needs or what Scottish people want.

    Their proposal like control of some health and safety, oh my excitement. The Scottish Government can raise higher bands of tax but can't lower them and only if Westminster is doing the same, what is the fucking point. All that does is add more fucking cost to adminster but then that is the Labour mantra. Clowns.

    I also can't really think about how much I loath Lamont now, she is a disgrace of a politician and as a Scot. She is a British Tory all the way through and I hold her lower than a toilet stain, but in saying that I will pray they keep her.

    She actually made the best case for staying in the union on the BBC when she said she would stand for election in an independent Scotland. Thats her secret plan, threaten to stay.

    The whole thing is an embarrassment and an insult and I find that party the most dishonest bunch of scumbags to ever grace this country. I really do despise Labour more than the Tories and Libdims. What have we ever done to deserve Lament, Murphy, Alexander, Cameron, Rennie, Osbourne, Clegg, Cable, hammond, May. I mean we let them steal our money, what do we need to do, sacrifice ourselves off London bridge, wankers.


  4. Sorry for the bad language and crap spelling but they have really got me angry again.


  5. Not at all Bruce, you're anger is entirely understandable. Sometimes you read about something or its reported and its difficult to maintain any sort of composure - especially when faced with such in your face fuckwittery.

    You're right about Lamont, I try to be as charitable as I can (I tried it with Eddie Izzard and his Better Together road show then had to changed my mind.) Sometimes the mind boggles, Lamont is terrible, that they've inflicted such a dimwit on us all... I can only assume some very cynical SpAd down south has decided Scotland will vote no out of fear of getting more like her.

    In my life I've voted for all the parties at one point or another, (even the Tories - I was young...) but I've never voted Labour.

    I have no idea how people CAN'T see through Labour in Scotland. I think many use their automatic (BBC-generated) dislike of the SNP as an excuse to continue with Labour even although they know just how stupid, hypocritical and self serving Scottish Labour politicians really are.

    Its like a get out of jail free card for Labour - people telling themselves "Yeah, Labour are bad but look at the evil SNP!!"

  6. Sorry I missed this earlier Paul.

    As usual a great piece, well written with plenty of you zany humour which makes it a joy to read.

    The proposals are laughable; the so-called "red paper" is a joke. Lamont ... I really don't know. I started off criticising her because she sounded a bit dim and she had the dress sense of a paint factory explosion... Some way I was sure I was wrong...after all they wouldn't pick someone as daft as she is... would they?

    But she has proved to be dense. She doesn't understand the questions she is asked much less come up with an answer so she resorts to "pulling resources" and "sharing risks".

    She seems to be oblivious to pulling resources meaning that we send a lot of money to NO, Wales and the North, SW and Midlands of England and to Cornwall.

    The sharing risks seems to mean that they send their dodgy leaking nuclear weapons to Scotland where, if they go bang, at least it won't be real proper Englishmen who will be killed, or radiated ... just Jocks.

    And this and Sarwar (who appears to be semi-detached) are the best they can find for us?...

    PS...I know this Moldovan woman who wants a husband.... for only €150 (cheques made payable to Munguin) she can be yours...

  7. Nice to see that Tavish Scott is taking such a keen interest in the independence debate. Do you think he's trying to make a comeback?

  8. @Angry Weegie.

    Has Tavish been bumping his gums? All any one needs to know about Tavish Scott is that he was replaced by Willie Rennie.

    Normally, when a leader is replaced - much like a mobile phone - some form of upgrade or improvement happens...

    ... which is precisely what happened when Rennie took over. That sort of puts Tavish in some context.


    Thanks, I hadn't added anything in a while and I began to feel guilty.

    Every now and again you can become a bit charitable, giving people the benefit of the doubt. But you can reasonably do that so often until it becomes really silly.

    In the same way Rennie replaced Scott, surely if Lamont is the best they can do, what does that say about the rest of the party in Scotland?

    I reckon they didn't want Miliband upstaged but they overcompensated.

    I recently learned that the UK government tested nuclear bombs on Australian soil, I think they exploded two bombs. That was way back in the 60's - while they'd never get away with that these days - what they're doing re. nuclear waste/subs/bombs is probably comparable.

    Its disgusting.

  9. I should say, thanks for the comments folks, I really appreciate them.



Thanks for comment as always and I apologise if you have to jump through any hoops to do so. Its just that, I'm still being spammed by organisations who are certain I can't get it up or when it is up its not big enough or that I don't have anyone to get it up for.

Who knew blogging could be so bad for ones self-confidence?