Busy busy busy... (Euro-elections, that arse Coburn and VNB's.)

So, its been a busy time recently and for my own part I have to admit to a bit of target paralysis.

Normally this happens to me in the aisles of a supermarket, I'll be wanting a loaf of bread or something for dinner but the choice is so abundant that making a decision becomes quite difficult. My bread-buying paradigm for example is quite simple: is it white and does it have seeds? If the answer to both is no (and it must be both) then we're on track. The thing is, there are a gazillion types of bread you can buy that a) isn't white and b) doesn't have seeds in.

Add to that the proclivity of certain food producers to periodically change their food packaging (to keep us on our toes...) I can often be seen gently corkscrewing in supermarket aisles until the circles close up and I collide with myself and fall over like a frightened goat.

Just realised looking at how blog previews appear on side bars (over at Tris' place for one,) the picture of David Coburn below was appearing. Well, I can't have that, so here is a picture of a fainting goat instead.

And so it has been recently up to a point. We've had so much going on - much of which has been ably reported and debunked by all the usual sources. Vote No Borders (of which more later) has had its tea dished out and been shown up for the fake that it is - right up to the SNP's 'humiliation' at the most recent Euro elections, even although they won it. Then we have the loathsome creature that is David Coburn of UKIP gaining a seat at the European Elections and the resultant crowing from unionists about Scots 'not being that different from the English after all'. Except, in England UKIP came first, in Scotland they came fourth.

More must be said about David Coburn. Openly gay and civilly partnered for some thirty years, he's an outspoken opponent of same sex marriage. He was reported (in the Scotsman) via this Pink Press article as saying:

“Civil partnerships should be enough. Gay marriage breeds homophobia as people are happy enough to tolerate gay people. 

“I don’t see the point of crossing the road to pick a fight with people of faith.”

There is so much wrong with that statement, coming as it does from a gay man, if it is typical of his judgement in that area, one shudders to think about what other views he has.

People 'are happy enough to tolerate' gay people? You'll have to excuse the profane language but fuck you David if you think I'm going to be happy with 'toleration'. And double fuck you for daring to tell young people growing up with the spectre of difference in their lives that the best they can expect from society is to be 'tolerated'.

When it comes to equality and the lives of young folk dealing with sexual orientation - or not, in some tragic cases -  I'd cross a lot more than a road to pick a fight with any sort of intolerance - which by the way, if you are merely 'tolerating' something - is exactly what intoleration means you absolute wastrel of a man.

Just having this here turns my stomach.

It goes with out saying, although I'll say it anyway, in this area Coburn is the worst sell-out; a poltroon, coward and yellow belly. In his newly elevated position he could become a role model, instead, he's a traitor set on echoing the same message that often drives young folk to the absolute brink.

Nobody expects you to join Stonewall Dave but you could at least shut your fucking face on the topic.

(I don't suppose Newsnight Scotland will be mentioning this blog article in their round up... Oh, hold on, Newsnight Scotland got the axe didn't it... Oh well... Scotland Tonight maybe... No?)

And so to Vote No Borders, the 'grassroots' vote no campaign not funded or staffed by grassroots unionists. Unless if by grassroots you mean a rich Tory donor more used to chucking his cash at the Conservatives in general or the sinister Michael Gove in particular - aided by a company specialising (or not because they were going bust) in developing national or regional images for countries around the globe?

You might have seen adverts in the cinema, I don't go often, but I was passing a large digital billboard in Edinburgh's Murrayfield area and a 'VNB' advert was running. These adverts consist of real Scottish people giving spontaneous... Wait a minute... If by real Scottish people you mean Jean T from Glasgow & Elizabeth also from Glasgow or Paul G from Paisley & Robert C from Glasgow plus a few more besides and if by spontaneous you mean these artfully presented interviews containing opinion based at best on misinformation and at worst on out-and-out inaccuracy - then yes.

I only mention it because although Vote No Borders has been thoroughly debunked and outed as a marketing exercise by a London-based organisation, its still out there like some posh landowner in his muck spreader drizzling Scottish cinema-goers & motorists alike with a not-so-fine spray of feculence.

For the real skinny on Vote No Borders, you might want to have a look at this spoof site on YouTube, although telling the difference between the two is often quite hard to do.

(You might also like to look at this from Lady Alba - A.K.A. @zanyzaz - who brought you Lady Alba's Bad Romance/Ga Ga for Indy. Who said there was no satire or humour in the debate?)

This independence referendum is about what kind of country you want to live in. Is it the mean-spirited vision of libertarianism expounded by the likes of David Coburn & Westminster Tories with their fuck-you-I'm-alright-jack form of society? Or is it the society-by-management-consultant, land of false hope & lies coming from British Labour?

You don't really need to look too deeply into either side of the campaign, ever more its becoming less about what they say and more about how they're saying it. Having a good sense of humour does not a successful country make, but having no humility what-so-ever makes the kind of country only the most committed authoritarian dictator could approve of - and this is where we seem to be drifting with UKIP and Westminster politics.

So there's your choice; a humourless drudgery dressed up as a libertarian paradise as advertised by the likes of Coburn who's libertarian views end with his own personal beliefs, a society where unionists (via an establishment-funded fake grassroots movement) apologetically tells you nothing will ever work 'unless you do it our way' - or a positive independence campaign that doesn't just tell you voting no is a terrible idea but tells why voting yes would be so much better - a positive case for independence - something the no campaign cannot match.

And, you get a bit of humour and humility into the bargain.

It was, is and continues to be: a no-brainer.

And no, there is still no sign of the mug.

The Monarchy.

Well, not really, I'm just trying to draw people in. Its about the eBay auction mentioned in the previous (somewhat brief) article published here. If you're a hardcore indyref operative with no time for frivolity - I won't be hurt if you move on to more serious subject matter.

It goes without saying, there was significant interest. Bidding was ferocious, the price shot up initially then plateau'd while the lightweights got out leaving only the serious collectors - and is it any wonder?

I mean, just look at the quality...

Even in the most common setting, true class shines through.

We can agree I need say no more on the topic - the item possessed a transcendental quality mere plebs are blind to.

The auction was tricky; in order to do justice to an artifact of this calibre, one must pick ones words carefully, the easiest way to demonstrate is to just show you those words.

I think now you understand why the bidding war that occurred, ummm, occurred.

With a starting price of 1p - it rose swiftly to 20p - and before long crept up to an eye-watering 80p. At that point there was a pause as warring bidders figuratively sized each other up. After three days of psychological warfare, movement could be seen as wily international collectors made exploratory bids - treble figures were achieved swiftly and the 100 pence mark was breached.

After a frenetic week in which 21 bids were made between three hard core contenders - a newcomer appeared at the 11th hour with an offer that smashed all previous bids: the cup was won. Commiserations went to the bidders who fought honourably while the Imperial Grail went to the Johnny-come-lately solicitant.

And so to the business of exchange: the invoice.

£5.50 - a 'Princely' sum of money?

And the buyer's response.

What can I say other than a big thank you to Don who made my day with his humour & generosity - something I like to think exemplifies what we on the Yes side are trying make large for Scotland in this sometimes fetid debate. I mean to say 'Wings' has its crowd funding and that works for them - but we have Jumble!

I'd like to say our Scouts are impoverished but coming as they do from a rather middle class background - they're not. They are however to a one, great fun to be around and thoroughly decent young human beings. If I was allowed (and I'm not) to have them thank Don for his kind donation by way of a video message - I would.

Rightly though, the Scout Association is strictly non-political. Even although members need no longer swear allegiance to God or the Queen, it's fleeting involvement ended with the auction. (What all that actually means is, people got a bit concerned when I asked for volunteers for Mug Annihilation Duty. Probably rightly so if I'm being honest - no one wants to be targeted by the Daily Express or by Franklin Mint Black Ops - they deny it but they exist...)

We spent a fair bit of time mulling over the various methods by which Don's wishes as the new owner could be carried out. We had a great many ideas; some daft, some extremely daft and one in particular that was spectacularly tasteless involving tunnels in foreign capitals. We (meaning I) became a bit concerned that destroying an item of this nature could attract quite a lot of ire, possibly even legal proceedings (is it traitorous to destroy and effigy of a future monarch?)

With that in mind, I had no choice but to cancel the destruction of the mug and send it to Don.

Unfortunately on the way to the Post Office...

(My skills as a film maker, I think you will agree, know no beginning.)

It seems fate had the same idea as Don did.

But then, we didn't see the mug smashed did we...

Maybe...

Surely not...

No, don't be daft.

Lazy blogging/Vote No Borders/A mug.

Apologies for this somewhat lazy blog entry.

This launch of Vote No Borders had to be commented upon and links to the details shared. I understand there may still be people thinking a positive case for the union exists. But if you put all of the arguments & counter arguments away - all of them - then forget all the personalities involved in the debate - completely and totally...

Imagine if you'd just come into the country and had no clue who Alex Salmond or the SNP were, had no knowledge of politics or the personalities involved and didn't know Alistair Darling from Alistair, ummm, McGowan. If a campaign conducted itself as the campaign for keeping the union is doing now - how could you ever vote in favour of it?

Some links which you may have seen already. (Apologies for the repetition, but on the off-chance there are those who read this blog - always a pleasant surprise to me - and no others, I'm reproducing them here.)

Firstly this from wingsoverscotland explains what 'Vote No Borders' is. Then this from Craig Murray and this from wings (again) explains how the no campaign is conducting their side of the debate aided & abetted by a pliant media.

This isn't the only example either.

I am occasionally staggered at things unionists supporters get away with saying and/or doing in the press although I'm not really surprised at the BBC's part in it, just disappointed. 

Yes Scotland could start solemnly promising an independent Scotland would be a land of milk & honey (something they've never said) and Alex Salmond et al could just scream the word 'freedom' at the moon. Because of the cack-handed methods being deployed by the no campaign to deliver their wretched agenda of fear - which we're all just expected to swallow...

- I'd still vote yes on the 18th of September.

Finally, although this issue around 'Vote No Borders' is intensely frustrating, there's always time for a laugh. You may have seen this link to an eBay auction on Twitter or facebook (if you can be arsed with those sorts of things.)

I welcome questions about the item, if I'm being honest, I don't expect to get any money for it (I'm hoping the person who wins the auction is someone I know so I can just hand it to them and save on postage.)

Its pretty much entirely for fun, it would be great if you could share it around (if it went viral, We'd all be thrilled.) Any money it did make (even if its just a quid) goes to my local Scout Group, (from which I'm likely to be asked to leave, given the nature of the eBay auction...)

Read it and you'll see why.